Today I want to talk about fears, I myself have many fears, including one of peas. Yes I know I’m weird. I can’t touch the damn things let alone eat them. Everyone has different fears and different triggers. Fears can vary from one person to the next, you can literally have a fear of anything. The strangest one I have heard of is a fear of Tea Bags.
My biggest fear is of Doctors. Especially having to go to a doctor’s appointment. I hate it. I end up having panic attack after panic attack in the days leading up to attending an appointment, usually it’s fine once I’m there and I can move on after I leave the surgery, but I still get anxious every time. Around a year ago now I attended an appointment with my doctor, it took me a good two years to work up the courage to be able to attend. I went to talk about my Anxiety, finally asking for the help that I needed. I was too scared to attend on my own but I was adamant that I did not want to take my mum. I ended up taking my best friend with me who sat in the doctor’s room and held my hand the whole appointment which made it a lot easier to talk. However the doctor I saw was so patronizing and meant I vowed to never go back to see him ever. The whole experience made my fear worse and every time I’ve had to attend a doctor’s appointment my heart pounds, my head throbs and I start to feel really sick. The whole experience played on my fear and made it worse.
I am currently reading a book called ‘Girl Online’ by Zoe Sugg. Within the book one of the characters suffers from anxiety, he suggests a good way to make the anxiety within you disappear and to help you relax is to picture the fear inside you and to give it a colour and a shape. This is supposed to help you relax and is theoretically to help the fear disappear. I’ve never tried this, but I like the sound, I may try it out tomorrow.
The reason I have brought up this topic is because tomorrow I start my first counselling session after being on a waiting list for almost a year, and nervous is an understatement. I get anxious about talking to professionals and I know I’m going to hate every second of it, but I’m looking forward to finally receiving the help I need. I strongly advise any of you thinking about getting help, it’s worth it, remember someone loves you.
So tell me, is there anything strange that makes your hairs stand on edge and your heart pound? Anything that makes you just want to escape? Any Crippling fears?
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